“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am made strong.”
2 Corinthians 12:9-10, ESV
I wish you could know how many times I’ve written and rewritten this first post of “Bumbling Beauty”. I want so much to come across with my authentic, genuine voice, to give to you the realest of “me’s” through this journey, even if that means I have to prune back a few layers to get there. I guess it’s fitting that there’s already been some bumbling involved in getting this introductory post in front of you: bumbling through where to start, or if I should even start, and if I do, what to say and how to say it. But that’s the beauty of this journey for me, embracing the bumbling, celebrating it, even. Why would I want to do something like that? Because, well, I don’t know that I really have a choice.
I myself am the bumbliest of bumblies, if you will. I’m silly, clumsy, and even a little awkward. I often find myself stumbling through life, both literally and figuratively, despite my tedious planning and tendencies towards perfectionism. Instead of this being a point of shame or embarrassment for me, I’ve decided to count it as a valuable part of who I am. Really, we all bumble a bit sometimes. The true beauty of that bumbling, for me, is that things like struggles, mistakes, and falls produce opportunities to experience the incredible gifts of grace, forgiveness, and unconditional love, not only from those around me, but also from my Heavenly Father, and even myself. My bumbles produce humility and force me to rely on my Savior’s faithful providence. My bumbles help me form deep, connected relationships with others because they remind me that I need community and can’t go it alone. My bumbles reveal and provide space for growth where I need it most, and they also remind me that sometimes you just have to have a good laugh when things don’t go as planned.
Perhaps the most beautiful part of all of this is that the God of all creation has declared and promised that my weaknesses, my bumbles, are miraculously converted into power and strength in His name, that His grace is sufficient to cover the not-so-pretty things in my life and in my heart. This is the beauty in the bumbling, that it teaches, grows, strengthens, refines, sanctifies, empowers, and connects us to the core of our humanity and the endless grace and love of Jesus Christ. If that isn’t something to celebrate, then I’m not sure what is.
So this space, then, is intended to serve a number of purposes, some of which I haven’t yet quite figured out. I know that God is doing a mighty work in me, teaching and calling and comforting me in the midst of what feels like a lot of mess and crazy and hard sometimes, and I know I’m not alone in that. I want to share a bit of myself with you, how God is turning my bumbles into beauty, and offer encouragement, but also give myself space to process through – well, everything. What I’ve learned in this short life of mine is that we as humans are designed to exist and function and thrive in communion – with God, with ourselves, with one another. I hope that by taking this opportunity to be vulnerable and transparent with you that it will create space for us to love ourselves, others, and the Lord more deeply and completely, regardless, or maybe in spite of, of our bumbles.
I am thankful for you, for your time, for this space and opportunity, and for your feedback. I’m looking forward to how the Lord will use this platform in positive ways, if not for many others, at least for myself.
I’m wishing you beautiful bumbling this week, my friends, let’s see where this takes us.